truth – Slacker Runner

But this isn’t giving up no this is letting go
Out with the old dreams I’ve borrowed
The path I carve from here on out will be my own
A path to take me home

Most of my runs lately have had me thinking deep thoughts. Maybe facing some truths too. I claimed that this was the year of no goals but I let myself get swayed by the dark side, the numbers side. It’s all too easy to get caught up with social media and fall into the comparison trap. Denying it can only dig you deeper and deeper into the hole. Combine that with a bunch of crappy things happening outside of running this year and I think I’m falling apart. Not completely but I’m starting to crack.

Which means a lot of things but one of those is letting go of those pesky numbers goals that snuck back up on me. I’ve become a little too mired in pace and miles. I realized the other week that I have run more miles this year than any year previous. Right after that, I realized how close I am to actually pulling off 1000 miles in a year. In other words, 2015’s failed goal. But let’s be honest, 2 hundred mile months right now would break me. Likely make me hate running too. I don’t want that, I want to enjoy running just to run for the rest of year. Maybe next year too. Who know? I want to enjoy races for awhile.

Thankfully, my iPod is still on shuffle all. The perfect song came on at the right time today.

This is Letting Go– Rise Against

So this me letting go. I saying it out loud…and in print. Hopefully, you’ll see a shinier Slacker in the coming months.

Truth– I didn’t run for 7 days. It made me twitchy in the beginning, feeling like I should get out and run, but the last few days the laziness felt easier.

Truth– I’m in a funk. Work funk, life funk, running funk. Can’t quite decide the best way out of the funk. I’ve considered going back to school–well, I’d have to finish it first.

Truth– Food and I have a very dysfunctional relationship. And it’s not working out anymore. It’s not like I can break up with it. For once, I’m not referring to my stomach issues. I’ve debated writing a longer post on this but haven’t figured out how.

Truth– Green tea is growing on me. Some brands taste like lemon pledge but some are pretty good.

Truth-I am trying to learn to like the treadmill. It’s a necessary training tool and if I want to run better I need to train better. Which means actually getting to the gym to run. So tonight, I laced up and ran a very slow 5k. But nothing ached for once- new for a treadmill run- so I’m calling it a win.

Truth-I love the cheesy holiday movies that are on every channel these days. My DVR is getting quite the work out these days. But-please, don’t hate me now- I am not a fan of Elf.

Truth– Tuesday was our company holiday party and I indulged with a Diet Coke- they all got wine and I had a Diet Coke. 😋

Truth– I just got distracted while typing this with one those previously mentioned Christmas movies.

Truth– I purchased a new toy- a Jawbone Up. Standing is not moving. I have a stand up desk but sadly I’ve been averaging 3500 steps a day- ouch!!

Truth– Everything said above is trivial in the grand scheme of things.

Truth– My commute took an hour and a half this morning, twice as long. But as I drove past the horrific wreck that was reason for the delay, I thought that we all just need to slow down. We all need to complain a little less and be grateful for what we have. Not only during the holidays- all of the days.

What’s your truth today?