Tag: fail

Week 39:Upcoming Races-Rock n Roll San Jose Training Week 11

Upcoming Races-

Rock n Roll San Jose 13.1 (Thank you BibRave!)-10/8
City to the Sea 13.1-10/14- maybe
Rock n Roll Los Angeles 13.1 (Thank you BibRave!)- 10/29
Monterey Bay Half Marathon (Thank you BibRave!)- 11/12

Peek weak redux? More like epic fail.

Like I said in Friday’s post this week was less than stellar. I was in a funk with no real reason as to why. I started the week out sick and things just kind of went down hill from there. We had an employee with a last day on Friday and it’s always sad when the team changes. On the upside, I finally have a hotel for my work trip coming up in October so I won’t be sleeping in my car, haha.

The plan called for a 6 mile run, 6 mile pace run, 10 mile long run and 3-4 cross training workouts.

Monday- Sick
I felt fine in the morning and had my running gear with me at work. However things went south around 4:00pm when I suddenly felt nauseous, clammy and like I was running a fever. I went home and just curled up under a blanket. It was still hot outside so it was a sign that I really wasn’t feeling well.

Tuesday- Liift4
I still wasn’t feeling well. I couldn’t focus and everything took so much more effort. I ran into my uncle during the day and he took one look at me and asked why the hell I went to work. I’m stupid?? I felt like a total sloth so I dragged my way through a Liift4 workout in the late evening. I did feel a little better after.

Wednesday-1.2 miles
Not what I intended. I planned to attempt 5-6 pace-ish miles around the lake path but the path had other plans. Creeper alert! Both could have been false alarms but my #1 rule is Be Paranoid. The first creeper was a windowless van parked on the path. Ummm, why? Next up was a gold Ford Fusion that slowed as it passed me, then drove in front of me. When it came back for a second, slower pass, I was done -I’m out. I’ll run another day.

Thursday- 3 miles
My leg was hurting. I was stupid and sat in my chair this week- why do I keep doing that- and it aggravates my right leg in a bad way. I toughed out 3 miles but managed to find a decent, easy pace actually. I knew more would probably be stupid judging by how the leg felt though.

Friday- Nothing
I just wanted to stay in bed all day but I went to work. I did bring back the desk chair instead of my stool though.

Saturday-Nothing
And I mean nothing. I set my alarm to get in my long run but when it came time to run I was so not feeling it. In fact I was feeling like being a sloth. So I did. The upcoming month of October is looking to be crazy busy and this was my last weekend before things get crazy. So, I did the bare minimum. I ran 2 errands and I napped.

Sunday- 6.35 miles
I should have napped more. I kept putting off this run because I really didn’t want to run. I wanted to be lazy but I told myself that was stupid. So I headed out for a run. Why? It was miserable. It was too warm, I wasn’t into it and my leg started to hurt towards the end. I walked a lot. I was done. I just looped and headed back to the car. I should have just skipped it. My pace wasn’t completely horrible- it was actually near marathon long run pace so I guess I have made some improvements in the last few weeks if I tanked that badly but it doesn’t look like it.

10.56 miles for the week. Yay. And with that it’s race week.

How was your week?

Week 32:Upcoming Races-Rock n Roll San Jose Training Week 5

Upcoming Races-

SLO ULTRA 5K-9/2
Rock n Roll San Jose 13.1 (Thank you BibRave!)-10/8
City to the Sea 13.1-10/14
Rock n Roll Los Angeles 13.1 (Thank you BibRave!)- 10/29
Monterey Bay Half Marathon (Thank you Bibrave!)- 11/12

If I had one word to describe this week, it would be- pain.

I think I watched more stupid movies than ever before. Netflix shamed me with “are you still watching” a few times. 😛I kind of buried myself in a dark hole, I was barely even paying attention to those movies, I just needed background noise (there were some good ones though).

The plan for this week was 3 runs- 4 miles, 40 min tempo, 8 mile long run- and 4 Liift4 workouts. Reality, however-

Monday- 2.5 miles
I was looking forward to my run after work. I thought I had 5 miles on the plan -oops – but I was on board with that. The bottom half of me apparently was not. Right from my first few steps, things felt off. My legs hurt- not just sore but hurt. I walked the first half mile hoping they would loosen up but no luck. I tried running and it felt like the pain was deep in my bones. WTH? A little over a mile in, I stopped to try and stretch it out and almost screamed. It hurt from my hips to my knees but in the bones. I turned around and hobbled back to the car. I didn’t know what was going on but it wasn’t worth risking an injury.

Tuesday- Liift4
My legs were still not right so I focused on my form and modified anything that required any jumping. I kind of do that anyway as I know my limitations but I really did it now.

Wednesday- Liift4
I drove to the lake path to run. I had changed, I had my pack in my lap but I wasn’t feeling it. Like deep down, really NOT feeling it. I’m not a believer in there are no bad runs. Yes, there are. The times in the past that I have forced myself to run when I feel that against it I have either hurt myself or broken a piece of running gear. I drove away without running but I wasn’t completely lazy.

Thursday- Migraine
Bring on the pain. I woke up to the oncoming pain but hoped it would ease up. Both because I had an early morning meeting and because I wanted to run after work. I finally admitted defeat around 11:30 and did something I rarely do- I went home sick. Then I spent the rest of the day napping, watching movies and alternating between being too hot or too cold.

Friday-Liift4 ish
I still had a migraine but I made it through work. I attempted Liift4 in the evening but I only pulled off the lifting portion. When it transitioned to the HIIT work, I tried one move and was like, umm, not happening.

Saturday-8 miles
Maybe it was the migraine that was still around but this was the hottest 8 miles of my life. In hindsight, I maybe shouldn’t have tried for my long run after 2 days of pain. I started my run around 9:15 and while that is early for me; it was already hot. Miles 1 and 2 were good and I was optimistic. I slowed during mile 3 but I was also entering the section I lovingly call the “surface of the sun” so that was to be expected. However mile 4 went south. It got super warm, I was too hot, I was feeling dehydrated and I almost threw up. I was almost out of water and I was only 4 miles in. I rerouted back to my car but I had slowed to a shuffle. I refilled at my car and sat there a bit as it was fully in the shade. By then I needed less than 2 miles so I dumped my pack thinking running without it would be cooler and just shoved my phone in a pocket and carried a water bottle and my pepper spray. I then looped the river trail and the neighborhood until I hit 8. This route needs some shade!

Sunday- Rest
I may have gotten in my long run but I was kind of broken the rest of the weekend. Not only did the migraine not go away, it was a little pissed at me after those 8 miles. The most strenuous thing I did on Sunday was clean my car. Except it was so dirty, that really was a workout.

10.5 miles for the week. I couldn’t have 2 good weeks in a row, could I. Shake it off.

How was your week?

Week 42- For Real

Upcoming Races-

Rock N Roll Las Vegas 5K
Rock N Roll Las Vegas 13.1!!!!!

Anyone else notice I skipped right past 41? I went from week 40 right to 42 last week. Oops. Apparently I forgot how to count, oops. 😛

All right let’s get to another episode of Confessions of a Chaotic Runner. Though I tried to ignore it and live in denial, by Thursday I knew I had a problem. When I had to put a customer on hold and pass the phone to coworker and excuse myself to run the restroom, there was probably something wrong. Problem is, I am so used to my stomach being an asshat on the daily due to my GI disorder that it was easy to lie myself about it being something else. I didn’t want to admit I had the weird bug going round. By Friday, I was coughing, bleary eyed, and just walking from my desk to the copier was exhausting. But I was still planning on a long run! Runners are crazy. My coworker told me I looked like her 5 year old- running a fever and ill but trying to convince her to take me to McDonald’s. Hmmm…accurate.

Monday- 3 miles Fairly, steady paced twilight miles. That will be the last venture into the actual river portion of the trail in the dark though. The most horrific, blood curdling scream rent the air just 1/2 mile from my car. WTH? What way do I go? I took the shortest path back to the street only to discover the source of the scream was a child throwing a tantrum at having to leave the park. Lady- hire your kid out for horror flicks.

Tuesday- Rest I am sure I did something else but I can’t remember what it was. Oh yes, the stomach troubles really started but I ignored them.

Wednesday- 2.3 miles Short easy miles as I was back at the lake and I will not run into twilight there due to previous creepy situations. But I got to enjoy a pretty good sunset.

Thursday- Rest I was feeling poorly but still refusing to admit that I was sick. I did let the registration window for a potential #29 close though- Ventura- so I wasn’t being completely stupid.

Friday- Sick I was still in denial. I took running clothes to work. Halfway through the day I finally admitted that I shouldn’t even be at work let alone running. But I forced myself to get through the day.

Saturday- Rest Other than running some errands, not a whole lot happened. I kept talking about running like it was going to happen but even I knew that would have been stupid.

Sunday- 5.25 miles Not sure if I would call that a long run but it’s the longest run I pulled off this week. I set an alarm for the morning but at some point in the night I must have turned it off. 😒 I still felt touch and go all day but I decided to attempt a run in the early afternoon. I maybe should have chosen a route with less hills. I wish it had been a little cooler than 80. I sat down on a wall at mile 4 because I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to finish the last mile. But I kind of had to as I had to get home. 😛

10.55 miles for the week. Kind of crappy but considering half the week was spent fighting some crappy stomach bug, I’ll take it with little complaint. I’ll save that for another week.

How was your week?

Tell me about your amazing running!

San Francisco Marathon Training Week 10

I have a hashtag for this week – #stupidshins

So yeah, another low mileage week in the books. You know if I was just running I would be pumped at 3 20+ mile weeks in a row, I mean my monthly average was in the 60’s so 3 weeks of 20+ would have been awesome. But for marathon training? I’m trying not to freak out over here. I am trying really hard to #findtheshiny here. So here we go.

Monday- Rest After Saturday’s race and Sunday’s migraine enforced rest, I considered running. I didn’t as I really wanted to switch my Monday running with Wednesday’s rest day. I think 3 days in a row will be much more manageable than the 4 I had on the schedule in May. With the day off of work and no running on the plan, I have to say it was kind of nice. My legs felt pretty good too, so I was optimistic for a good week.

Tuesday- 3.5 miles I had 3 potential goals for this run- move my Thursday run of an 8 mile tempo up as it was projected to be over 100º. If I wasn’t feeling up to that, then the planned intervals of 4 x1200, if not that then a good 7-8 miles. None of that happened.

Right from the get-go, something felt off. Then it just plain hurt. I ran 1 lap of the lake and changed my shoes. That didn’t help. I ran- walked- hobbled another 2 laps. I also sat on a rock and stared at the lake a bit. Tried telling myself that all the pain was in my head but it wasn’t. Grrr. Home for some RICE.

Wednesday- Rest So much for running on Wednesdays. My shins hurt, my ankle hurt so I rested. I also started alternating between heels and flats throughout the day at work.

Thursday- 3.5 miles Oddly, I kind of missed my tempo. Who knew? I ran/ walked a slow 3.5 miles. My shins were not happy but it didn’t feel like pain just severe achiness. It was also very hot, so that helped keep things nice and easy.

Friday- Rest Work was super busy though, so I felt a little ragged. My boss in on vacation for a few weeks so that means Friday’s are an open to close kind of thing for me.

Saturday- 13.1 miles- The weekend was predicted to be a hot one so I forced myself to get up early. It wasn’t early enough. 😓 I set out for my long run and planned to take it nice and slow and walk whenever I felt more than twinge from my shins. Surprisingly, I felt ok so I kept running. I reassessed how I felt at each point where I could make the run shorter or add a little mileage. I only felt one odd twinge but it passed quickly.

What I hadn’t planned well for was the heat. I started at 7:30! It warmed up faster than I planned. There were a few sections where I felt like I was running on the surface of the sun- those were mostly walked. I also realized by mile 6 that I was going to run out of water. I had a 24 oz handheld but it wasn’t enough. I just told myself I had to get to mile 9 and I could run into the AM-PM. Except that was actually mile 10. Oops. My head felt like it was swollen and too big for my hat and the humidity had jumped drastically. From mile 8.5 to 10, I just kept chanting AM-PM, AM-PM – I had about an ounce of water left. I ran in and bought a Gatorade and a water. I poured the Gatorade into my water bottle and carried the extra water bottle. I was a two-fisted drinker for the last few miles. I will never run long without my debit card again.

I knew I was going to be slow due to my shins so when I finished in 2:30, I was actually pretty stoked. If it hadn’t been so hot, I would have shaved a couple minutes off and that’s actually pretty spot on my long run pace.

Sunday- Rest While my legs feel ok, there is one hot spot on my shin that I don’t like. After a mental argument with myself, I chose to rest. It’s not what I want to do but isn’t the saying that under trained is better than injured?

Crap, that only adds up to 20 miles. Why did I think it was more? Grrr. But I had a good long run, so that’s shiny right?

Looking to this week, I am going to listen to my legs and go from there. Speed work is off the schedule for now but I do hope to see the miles go back up. I am only 8 weeks out now and that is kind of scary. I really need to find more hills too or San Francisco is going to eat me for breakfast. 😛

How was your week? Anyone race?

Do you run with money?

How’s your weather?

2016- Breaking Free

It’s that time of year! Social media is filling up with goals and resolutions for 2016. For runners, that often shows as mileage goals, pace goals, race goals, etc. Along with all the other things we want to accomplish in the year to come. So without further ado- here are my goals for 2016-

No need to refresh your screen, there’s nothing there. I’m not setting goals for 2016.

There I said it. I’ve had this post half written for months, talked about it with my mother, talked about it with my boss. But clicking publish? Sharing it with a community who thrives on goals? A community that uses hashtags like #goaldigger? That was harder than I thought. So let’s break it down.

I set goals in 2014 and 2015. 2014 was about 50/50 for goal completion. 2015? I didn’t compete a single goal. Not one. 2015 was a stressful year, and worrying about hitting some arbitrary mileage/pace goal wasn’t helpful in calming me down. Feeling like I “should” run just to add to my total was harshing my running joy. That’s just one example. 2015 also had it’s share of shiny and that will be up in my next post.

Now, this is isn’t to say that I don’t want to improve. I do. I will continue to search for the training plan that works for me. I will do my speed work and my long runs. I will enjoy my easy runs more. I will still track my mileage and the paces I hit. Just not for some random number total I pick because I think it looks good. I want to become a better runner, but in a more natural, linear progression kind of way. Because I enjoy running enough to do it often and not just because I should get in that extra 3-4 miles. I will still recap my training and running, I like sharing with you all and I look forward to the feedback. Between this blog and Timehop, I am able to look back at the way things have changed for me over the past few years. I still like looking at all the numbers; I just need a break from the pressure of feeling like I don’t measure up. I used to care less about how I measured up with everyone else and I need to get back there. Back to basics, I was there in 2013, can I find that calm again?

2014 started a ball of stress that grew and grew in 2015. I felt like a boulder being rolled down a hill picking up mud along the way. Some of the stressors are things that I am not currently in the position to change, others I can. Starting with how I react to it. I did a piss poor job in 2015. Going forward, I want to focus on calming the hell down. And turning to food less, but that’s another story.

I want to try to focus on finding the shiny in things in life. Running should be one of those things. Now I realize that most of my runs will be hard and tiring and there will still be days I want to quit but I used to enjoy the hard or rough days. I haven’t in a long time. I need to change my mindset and in order to do that “goals” and I are taking a break. Goal has become a four letter word in my book, it’s joined the ranks of “potential”. I dislike that word and try to never use it but that’s not the point here.

Don’t get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having goals. I just need a break from them. Call it a trial separation. Maybe this won’t work, maybe it will. Either way, it’s something I need to do. The journey to an improved Slacker starts now but goals are not invited on this road trip.

So, are you still with me or have I scared you all off?